My little angels

The girls just haming it up!

posted by jennro @ 1:44 PM 0 comments

Watching them Grow...

posted by jennro @ 1:10 PM 0 comments

The Birthday Cake

posted by jennro @ 1:04 PM 0 comments

Weesha Just Being Her Cute Self

posted by jennro @ 7:35 AM 1 comments

My two precious munchkins walk hand in hand together and it just makes me wonder, how long will they walk hand in hand together in life? Will they still be the best of friends when puberty strikes? If one becomes popular in school and the other becomes the nerd, will they still back each other up? When they grow older and share a crush on a boy, will the crush actually crush them? Will they still see each other and talk when they have munchkins of their own?

My sister and I grew up together, we got along real well, we still talk all the time and our munchkins laugh and play together, but not every sibling can say that. I just bought the girls matching sandals for the summer and since it was so hot last weekend, I decided to let the girls wear them. After driving around with them (I had to roll the windows down since it was so hot) we finally head home with the groceries and suddenly see that Alicia has her sandals still on, but Ashley's are gone. I look around the floorboards - no shoes. I check under the seats - no shoes. I check behind the car seats and around the sides between the door and the car seat and still - no shoes! Finally I ask her, "Ashley, where are your shoes?"

As cute as she can be - Ashley points out the window and says, "oh, my shoes."

If you see a brand new set of toddler size 7 sandals laying out on the highway, now you know who chucked them... Aye!

posted by jennro @ 11:20 AM 0 comments

The Craziest Things...

My daughters have really grown quite a lot lately. My Alicia is going to be celebrating her 2 year old birthday this April. Ashley will be 3 this May. The girls both brush their own teeth. Ashley prefers to put her clothes on by herself. We are still in potty training but she now wants to take off and put on her own pull-ups. Alicia is feeding herself completely and won't let mom feed her anymore. She takes her own diaper to the trash and puts on her own shoes alone.

Sounds like a dream to some... but to me, it's a realization that I no longer have babies... I have toddlers who are quickly becoming completely independant. In one sense, it's a happy and welcomed change, but in another sense, it's my daughters showing me that pretty soon they won't need me to help with anything. Time seems to march on at a quicker beat than I'm prepared to follow.

Although this "change in the seasons" is a sad necessity, it is also good to know that at least they will still come running to me for all the hugs...

posted by jennro @ 11:22 AM 0 comments

Just Another Day, like Every Day

Doing my best to keep my head above water. I guess you can say that is my day to day battle. Sometimes I can be the most "together" kind of woman and other days, I want to scream, "No I don't have all the pieces to this puzzle called life figured out yet!" I guess you can say that each day has it's own challenges and to go at it alone with two small girls is just intimidating, and scary. My husband of five years is almost completely out of our lives, where his abuse will never touch us again and while this is a good thing that he will no longer be around us, it hurts to think that such a man could exist... that he could be so violent to his wife and then his own children... what happened to that special bond between father and daughter? Why was hurting us more important to him than loving us? So I stumble through each day, a single mom of two small girls, wondering if I have the strength to continue forward. Will my girls learn to be strong and independant? Will they respect me or harbour hatred against me for leaving "daddy"? Will they understand? I can only hope so...

posted by jennro @ 1:27 PM 0 comments

I Never Said it Was a Picnic!

Okay, I never said raising you girls was a picnic. Now don't get me wrong... I wouldn't trade it for anything this world has to offer, but it is hard sometimes - okay - it's hard most of the time. My days are filled with the office and then to the daycare and then home with my wonderful girls. Grocery buying has turned into the ultimate nightmare, especially when you have two babies in the cart and both are grabbing anything they can get their little grubby hands on! If I weren't the type to scrutinize the cart before going to checkout, I would have found myself purchasing sugar cookies, three cartoon books, two romance novels, a pack of men's gillette shavers, doggy treats (we don't have a dog) a few cat toys (I refuse to let my human girls play with animal toys... period!) not to mention the many different brands of shampoo and the pregnancy test that made it into the cart also! Okay, the pregnancy test was certainly not needed - unless it was through divine intervention - hey, I took biology class - I know what it takes!


So getting the groceries into the apartment turns into this weird transfer game where I juggle the bags in one hand, my 13 month old Alicia in the other hand, and manage to convince my 2 year old Ashley to hold onto the toilet paper while we trek from the car to the apartment (this in itself is a tremendous feat! Especially since we live in a basement apartment!)



My girls continue to grow and continue to surprise me with all the new things they pick up... Alicia calls me "mama" unless she really wants something right away, that's when she calls me "maaaaaaaaaa" and Ashley just let me know that she is definitely ready to potty train (I say she is 2 years old but she will actually be 2 this May!) Ashley now knows how to take off and put on her own clothes, remove her diaper and use a wipe all by herself, and put on her own socks and shoes. Since she also tries to brush her own hair and she is doing really well on brushing her own teeth, you could imagine my amazement at the fact that she won't say "peepee" or "potty" but instead she alerts me by dancing in place while holding her hands to her privates and saying "ill ill ill"!

Needless to say, since this behavior has just begun this week, I have had to scrub out the carpet in the hallway, the bathroom, and re-wash her bed sheets twice this week... so... how long does it last before they finally get how to potty?!?!? I'm sure we will survive through it but most certain that I probably have the cleanest carpet in the world with all of the scrubbing I've done this week alone.

Of course, after putting me through these horrible potty mishaps, the girls tend to do some of the cutest things which just make it all seem fine... we went to the park and they both were so excited that they continued to point at flowers and squirrels and trees all the while, laughing up a storm and saying "oooohhhhhh" and my personal favorite "uh oh - whoa!" Yeah, I think I can handle it!

Note to Self:

It's funny how you get so used to the married life that you become oblivious to other members of the opposite sex and when you get ready to divorce - your dating radar still has a lot of kinks in it... A co-worker actually had to tell me that some guy was hitting on me at the front desk - all the while during his five minutes of talking about restaurants and nice hiking trails to visit, I was obliviously wondering why he was still standing there telling me all this... and then my co-worker says, after he left of course, "Jenn, why did you brush him off like that? Wasn't he cute?" Then it hits me and I ask her, "You mean - he was hitting on me???" So note to self: You don't wear a wedding band anymore... don't act like you still do.

posted by jennro @ 9:38 AM 0 comments

Alicia at 4 months

This is just a peaceful moment

posted by jennro @ 10:18 AM 0 comments

A Tribute to Mom part 2

Your water breaks and it's accompanied by horrible pain! You are rushed to the hospital and you feel this tremendous pressure as each contraction hits you... "what did I get myself into" you cry as you ask for the epidural... that 2 inch long needle that will be inserted into your spine and you think you might just pass out...

You're on the bed with your legs spread eagle and pushing, the epidural has kicked in and you feel pressure but the pain is significantly less and you thank God you're not giving birth 200 years ago... and finally after umpteen hours you hold her for the first time, umbilical cord still attached and you feel the heartbeat of your brand new little baby! You marvel at how tiny she is and suddenly begin to forget all the pain that you just went through...

At home you cuddle your baby, half sleepy as you try to soothe her and feed her even though you're only running on 3 hours of sleep. You're exhausted and you find yourself spending most of your time making diaper runs and warming bottles and then it hits you... you wouldn't want to be doing anything else at this moment. As she settles in for another signature quick nap, you hold her in your arms and realize you are a MOM and as your fears and insecurities begin to slowly melt away and your instincts that you thought you were born without start kicking in, you know in your heart that you will weather any storm, take on any challenge, and give her the best of you...

Thank you mom for giving me your best and don't worry, I will give my girls my best as well. I love you mom.

posted by jennro @ 6:06 AM 0 comments

A Tribute to Mom part 1

You found out that you were about to have a baby... you're already 8 weeks in... what goes on in your head? You try to figure out what bills you will now have to pay - and God - look at the cost for diapers and formula alone - How are you going to clothe your child, are you going to screw up?

You go to the Doctor's Appointments and as each month goes by, you see the life you used to have slipping away... you look at those cute jeans you bought 6 months ago and wonder if you will ever get to wear them... will you ever have the strength to get through this?

Another couple of months and the toilet has become your new best friend, your girl pals tell you all the crazy things they did last weekend and you wish you could have been there as you rub your ever growing belly. You feel the usual kicks and you start to smile, wondering what this baby will look like - will she have my eyes? Will she be smart? Will she be successful? Will other kids tease her when she goes to school - God I think I'll just die if someone ever breaks her heart!

You get into that final month and things really start to go crazy. Strangers keep rubbing your belly and co-workers make the usual comments, "Wow - You're Huge", "you look like you're going to pop", "You know when I had my baby...", "you should do... that's what I did", and you smile politely at all the comments and recommendations but you just wish people would keep their hands to themselves and you want to tell your co-workers to just shut up!

You get to the count and your due date is fast approaching... you think back to those parenting classes you took and that horrible video they showed you of the woman giving birth and cringe "Oh God, I can't do this!" You feel the tickle as your baby kicks and moves about and smile...

posted by jennro @ 5:24 AM 0 comments